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10 Promising Republican Candidates For 2024

Biden, who is the most popular candidate to ever be elected president, will be a tough opponent to beat in 2024. To face Biden, the Republican Party will need to bring out their best and brightest to...

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‘Racial Division Will Never Go Away,’ Reports News Organization That Is...

MINNEAPOLIS, MN—As news organizations descended upon Minneapolis on the anniversary of George Floyd’s death, anchors and reporters solemnly reminded the country that racial division will likely always...

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Brilliant: Trump Begins Running 2024 Campaign Ads On Gas Pumps

U.S.—Well, it looks like the 2024 presidential race is kicking off, with former (and possibly future) President Donald Trump running his first set of ads on the television screens at gas pumps across...

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THE WOKE ZONE: Protestors Peacefully Burn Down Man’s Business

Unlock a door to a dimension where riots are peaceful and silence is violence. This is The Woke Zone. In our latest video, enter into the Woke Zone as one man sees a riot on the side of the store — but...

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Protecting Joey

I am here to address the accusations being hurled by the Radical Right against the man currently occupying the White House, Joey Biden. For most of the six-or-so months since his election, I have been...

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First-Ever Pride Month Ruined By 40 Days Of Rain

MESOPOTAMIA—It was going to be the first-ever Pride Month — a celebration of everyone doing everything they feel like doing in their hearts all the time — when it suddenly started raining and didn’t...

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Fauci Conspiracy??????????????

Wow, it seems the radical right is attacking the integrity and honesty of the esteemed “Dr” Fauci. The right is now claiming the good doctor has a slew of e-mails suggesting that there was a good...

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In Honor Of Pride Month, Here Are The Babylon Bee’s Top 2 Genders

Well, it’s pride month, which is a time of celebration for all orientations, biological sexes, and genders. Thirty full days of celebrating all the letters in the LGBTQ+ alphabet — what fun! We at The...

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Trump Reveals First 10 Items On His Agenda For When He’s Reinstated As...

Trump is going to be reinstated as president this August, reliable sources have informed us — the best sources, everyone says so. When this happens, he has a lot of work to do returning America to its...

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More Democrat Governors Moving To Florida To Escape Their Own COVID Policies

U.S.—A shocking study has found an increasing number of Democratic state governors are fleeing to Florida, desperate to escape the ravages of their own COVID lockdown policies. The report found that...

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Kamala’s Dilemma

I am here to reach out to The New York Times, and especially to their executive editor Dean Baquet, to get their input on Kamala’s historic trip to Guatemala. After putting on her diplomatic genius for...

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Democrats Demand Republicans Pay Them Reparations For Freeing Their Slaves

WASHINGTON, D.C.—Democrats in Washington are demanding reparations from the Republican Party for the massive financial losses of Democrats following the emancipation of the slaves. “It’s been many...

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Biden: ‘If You Don’t Use The N-Word, You Ain’t My Son!’

WASHINGTON, D.C.— An enraged Joe Biden attacked the media this morning for targeting his son over the use of N-word, stating that such language only confirmed that Hunter is, in fact, his son. “Why in...

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Kamala Starting To Crack

It seems Kamala’s perpetual smile and giddy laughter is becoming less and less these days.  Maybe it was those Guatemalan’s holding banners saying , Trump won, go home.  I’m not even sure this is true,...

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Oh, those pesky questions to Nancy, Kamala and Joey

I hope today finds you well. Well the radical right is off to the races again. Common targets are the usual suspects, Joey, Kamala and even the face of the Democratic Party, Nancy Pelosi. It seems the...

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World’s Economy Saved As Giant Crack In Earth Swallows Up All G7 Conference...

CORNWALL—A time of peace and prosperity has broken out across the earth after a sudden earthquake opened up a crack in the earth’s crust and swallowed up all G7 world leaders in mere seconds. Witnesses...

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In Honor Of Pride Month, Biden Announces He Will Also Sniff Men’s Hair

WASHINGTON, D.C.—In a televised address this week, President Biden voiced support for the LGBTQ community and promised to honor them with a commitment to not only sniff women’s hair, but also men’s...

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Trump Announces He Is Building 1,954-Mile Long Trump Hotel Along Southern Border

RIO GRANDE CITY, TX—Trump flew to America’s southern border this week to announce a brand-new Trump hotel unlike anything the world has ever seen. The planned hotel will be almost 2,000 miles long and...

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Federal Judge Rules That Jewish Baker Must Make ‘Death To Israel’ Cake For...

NEW YORK, N.Y.—A federal appeals court judge has ruled that a Jewish bakeshop owner must comply with his Arab customer’s request to bake a “Death To Israel” cake. Jacob Greenstein, the owner of Jake...

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VIDEO: Five Troubling Signs That Your Baby Might Be A White Supremacist

Newborns can be a lot of work. Diapers, lack of sleep, and the possibility that they are racist. These five tips could help!  RELATED POLITICAL SATIRE: Congress Passes Law To Recognize Juneteenth, The...

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